I hate work

Have I mentioned how much I hate work right now? I've been toying with the idea of working just part-time and doing that for a while. I could deal with the reduced income, and the extra days would be so nice to have. I just don't know how that would work, whether or not work would go for it.

Last night I stopped by Sue's place to drop off the video camera. They had a movie night and for some reason it really bothers me that they don't invite me to it. I harbor this bitterness with her and heather for this movie night because I feel left out and I thought our friendship was a little stronger than that. I want to talk to her about it, but then I feel like a wuss (e.g. girl) when doing it. "I feel so left out and I don't like that." wah wah wah...get over it josh, it isn't worth worrying about.

Late night last night, as I needed to go shopping and get a bunch of stuff from the grocery store that I didn't do on monday. Shoot, 3 days after the retreat ends and I am already running on fumes.

What is it about people that saps their energy? Is it worrying about a situation and not doing anything about it? i know I do that. a lot of times I have to conciously say to myself, "don't think about it, it's not worth it" because I have been thinking about it for the last hour. (i.e. sue and heather's movie night) otherwise I would be drained by the end of the day...I do this at work too...there are tough problems at work that I don't know if I can get my mind around and I doubt myself so much when it comes to these problems...I'm afraid to tackle the problem because the consequences of being wrong is the success of the company itself. I am not satisfied with the success our company has, and that it could be better, but I am scared more of trying to make it better and failing.