Pursuit

Lately I've been thinking about family. And because I've been thinking about the family so much, it makes me question why I want one...I've always been a more single minded kind of guy, not dealing with multiple priorities very well...I tend to focus on one and ignore the other. Because of this, I tend to think,"if I desire a family that much, it isn't possible to desire God, because you can really only desire one thing intensely. " Maybe this is wrong, but that is the way I operate, as I tend to pursue one goal at the cost of a lot of other lesser desires. So maybe the statement really is, "I can only pursue one thing. I can really only pursue one thing at a time, and if I am not pursuing God then I cannot pursue a family. If I pursue a family, I cannot pursue God. It's a double-edgged sword, because this singlemindedness helps me get things done, but on the other side, I tend to ignore other issues that may need to be addressed. So what do I do? I don't want to lose that singlemindedness, and to start caring about the periphery issues or pursuing the periphery issues will cause me to lose my singlemindedness..

a quandry indeed.