So I am finding out that I am not quite over K as much as I thought. I hold myself back from sharing anything again, and I find myself being much more sarcastic than I should be, to the point of not knowing how NOT to be sarcastic. Maybe it has to do with the fact that being sarcastic is safe for me, it doesn't require anything of me, but being honest and transparent to people is a lot of commitment and risk. Maybe I still have supressed anger with K and as I hurt people with words, I feel that much better, thinking that I am better than they are, if I am honest with myself. Now if that doesn't testify to the depravity of men, I don't know what will.
I can handle the commitment and risk when it comes to small group, my family, and select few friends, but anyone else I am major sarcastic. If I could count the emails and conversations that I have with people apologizing for my behavior, I probably would be a little more careful with my words and seek to be more encouraging and building up, rather than tearing down.
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